Friends fight.

Day by day, everything is seemingly becoming bad and worse. Making me feel bothered, paranoid, cynical and distant. People hate me, ignore me and I did them wrong. I feel like I am no longer my old self and I need to introspect.

I feel that the beast in me has outstood the old good self that I've been trying to keep. Then, I have good friends, good acquaintances, good workplace, and a better state of mind. Right now, things are just seemingly difficult and challenging. They are no more as undemanding as before.

I hurt my friends and thrown them words unbecomingly way forgivable. I was angry, I was dramatic and emotions were just astoundingly untamable.

On...

Me: Do you hate me?
You: Honestly, I dont know.

"I'm sorry. I've already caused you so much problem. You've been a very good friend and I'm sure you yourself know that. You exactly spoiled me too much and I abused it. Right, all I am really hoping right now is for it to pass. I feel ashamed and guilty and during these times I feel very incapable. Please forgive me if I tend to become irrational and insensitive. I guess there are just a lot of things right now that I have to work on myself and by myself. I'm sorry for all of this. Guess what, I might have more issues than those people who we thought have plenty of them."

On...

Me: I love him.
You: Stay away from him.

"I'm not mad Garfield, I knew you're going to say that... I can't blame you for being yourself... you are entitled of whatever you want to believe and even entitled to have a fair judgment towards people. I can't blame you for hurting me and spoiling my day. It is YOU, Garfield, and I will see you in a very different light if you didn't tell me to stay away from him and just let us, or at least me, happy. Nothing ever changed. You know, I appreciate it that you fight for your friends and protect them. Just don't be too busy thinking about them than your own self."